12 Movies That Could’ve Been Improved By Adding A Talking Fish

1. Citizen Kane

Touted as one of the greatest films of all time, my only gripe with the movie was that there was never a talking fish to be seen anywhere. Rosebud didn’t need  to be a sled. Instead, it could’ve been a wisecracking fish?

2. E.T.

Listen, if you’re going to have me believe that a talking alien can come to earth and make a child fly around on a bicycle, you’re going to have to show me a talking fish. It’s only the next natural step, and while I knew that talking fish existed, I wanted to actually see them.

3. D2 The Mighty Ducks

Quack! Quack! Quack! Now, if you’d never seen the Mighty Ducks, you might think that those sounds were made by a duck, but they were actually made by humans! If we’re going to make humans make animal noises, we have to see a fish making human noises!

4. National Treasure

Nicholas Cage was great at being a historical detective, but I bet his job would’ve been slightly more challenging and slightly more entertaining had he been carrying around a fishbowl with a talking fish as a sidekick.

5. Finding Nemo

I know what you’re thinking. “The fish in this already talk!” However, they’re actually only talking to each other. As great as that is, the story would’ve been much more compelling if one of the fish had stumbled upon a way to communicate directly with humans, much like the way the toys in Toy Story talk to Sid.

6. Toy Story

I honestly find it hard to watch this movie without thinking of how it might look if the toys were all replaced with talking fish. I bet Sid is scared of fish. A fish should’ve talked to him at the end.

7. Pirates Of The Caribbean

While the fighting skeletons and octopus faces are fun to see dancing around, it was a glaring omission on the parts of the filmmakers to leave out the number one residents of the ocean: talking fish.

8. Les Miserables

Russell Crowe sounded like he was drowning every time he tried to sing, so it might have been beneficial for them to add someone who doesn’t drown underwater for all of these songs. For example, a talking fish.

9. Sharknado

While Sharknado was entertaining, it also makes you wonder what all those sharks caught up in the tornadoes are thinking. If even one talking fish were added to the cast of this film, we may have had a little bit of insight into their lives and experiences.

10. The Sound Of Music

I always forget what Gretl looks like, but if they had used a talking fish to play her part, I’d be more likely to remember what she looks like.

11. Man Of Steel

This movie could’ve used anything fun.

12. My Cousin Vinny

As far as I know, fish don’t normally eat grits, so I just think it would be interesting to have a talking fish on set letting everyone know what they thought of the explanation of grits and the way they’re prepared.