After 11 Years Of Searching, I Am Finally Giving Up My Dream Of Riding In The Cash Cab

Everybody has dreams. For some, those dreams may be small and personal, and for others, they may seem lofty and almost out of reach. No matter what, we've always been told to never give up on our dreams. We hear the Cinderella stories of the people who had nothing, who, in a moment of desperation, suddenly ended up getting everything they'd ever wanted. We hear the tale of the hard worker, continually keeping their head down until one day, preparation meets opportunity and they break through to the other side. We hear all the wonderful stories of success but what we forget is that for every successful story, there are a thousand failures.

My life's dream has been one of those failures. After 11 years of searching, I am finally going to accept that I will never ride in the Cash Cab. 

When I first saw Cash Cab in 2005, I was captivated as people were delighted and surprised, finding out that not only might their ride be free, but that they could possibly win some money. To me, the Cash Cab represented the ultimate fantasy that life could provide. As I watched on and continued to be charmed by Ben Bailey and the way he joked around with his Cash Cab contestants, the more I became determined to make it in to that cab.

That's why when in 2007, my 11th grade Humanities teacher asked us who wanted to go on a field trip to New York, I jumped at the chance. Sure, I'd been to New York a few times before, but never with the possibility of the Cash Cab on the horizon! My friends and I tried everything we could to scope out the Cash Cab. We thought we might be able to see the lights inside, or spot Ben Bailey, but we had no such luck. The only thing we could do was try to get inside different cabs until we found the right one. 

We tried over and over again, taking cabs to the MoMa, to Rockefeller Plaza, to the Apple Store outside of Central Park. Nothing. We were only staying there for a few days, and time was running out. We'd had regular taxicab interactions with regular taxicab drivers. 

If this were a movie or a story, I'd now be talking about how we were plucked from hopelessness and shown that the way to achieve our dreams was to learn some great lesson, but that isn't what happened. What happened was that we got back on the bus that had brought us to New York, and we left, not a penny richer. 

I would return to New York on a weekend trip with my cousins in 2009, but to elaborate much further would be a waste of time. I took a cab from the airport to Chinatown, and then from Chinatown to 5th Avenue. Later on, I'd take a cab back to the airport. Once again, no Cash Cab. 

At this point, I may as well have given up on my dream, but for whatever reason, I didn't. I lived in Michigan from 2008-2011. No Cash Cab. I lived in Orlando, Florida for the first half of 2012. No Cash Cab. I've been living in Los Angeles since 2012 and I've yet to get in the Cash Cab. 

I was aware that the Cash Cab was based in New York, but I'd always held on to the hope that they would try to surprise people by going all across the country. After all, they popped up in Vegas. Even when the show was canceled, I figured they were just saying that to get people to stop looking. But after 11 years of nonstop searching, I've decided that it's finally time to let this dream go.

I drive my own car now. When I don't, I'm using Uber or Lyft, not taxicabs. 

Though it will be tough for me to let something that's had this big of an impact on my life go for good, I think that it will be healthy for me. A burden will be lifted from my shoulders, and I'll feel more at ease with the world. 

Who knows? Maybe I'll get in a yellow taxicab just for the hell of it. I know it won't be the Cash Cab, but it'll remind me of a time in my life when my dreams were just a little clearer. 

Goodbye, Cash Cab. And thank you.