Batman v Superman: If You Watch This Movie With Sunglasses On, It's Way Too Dark To See Anything
If you were expecting to go to a movie theater to comfortably watch a fun superhero romp while wearing your favorite pair of Ray Bans, you're going to be severely disappointed by Batman v Superman, because the whole movie is way too dark to see anything with sunglasses on.
Zack Snyder tries his very best to deliver a good time at the movies, but his natural inclinations towards low-light film-making all but ruins the experience for those of us who like to protect our precious eyes from the bright sun. The beginning of the movie opens with the sounds of what I assume are either some sort of helicopter or bat-copter or something, which I'm sure might be cool visually, but doesn't translate well when you're deliberately wearing a device designed to block out light. From there, it's all just boring talking, loud explosions, and a wall of grays and blacks.
Batman's costume blends in with the city of Metropolis, which will probably blend in with most movie theaters. While this is probably useful for Batman, it is not very fun for us, Mr. Snyder. Yes, I want my Batman to be able to hide in the shadows, but what I don't want is to not be able to see him at all. I'm wearing sunglasses because I'm worried that the sun will shine too brightly into my local theater, not because I'm worried that the Batman will shine too brightly. C'mon, Zack!
Superman's costume fares no better. With my sunglasses on, the movie was so dark that it honestly looked like Batman and Superman were wearing the same exact costume. Don't you know that they're not the same person, Zack? Batman and Superman were both made out to be so incredibly similar that I found myself questioning why they were arguing in the first place. Where's the big S on Clark's chest? Where's the big bat symbol on Bruce's costume? From my point of view, there was no difference.
There was one big explosion towards the end of the film that I could distinguish through my sunglasses, but I felt like that burst of color was never really earned. Plus, it went away so quickly that I was only viewing something that wasn't completely dark for maybe 8 seconds total. The darkness of the film made it so difficult to enjoy that I sometimes wondered if taking a nap would've produced the same experience with more restful results.
Batman V Superman was so dark with sunglasses on that it was almost unwatchable. Let's try a little bit harder with your next movie, DC. Maybe try picking a director who will consider the Batman and Superman audience: fans of superheroes who also wear sunglasses everywhere they go.
